Rewrite Your Story: Raglan 2025
Reflections from a Brotherhood Weekend at Karioi Maunga.
Written by Billy Lewis on the plane ride home. Edited with the help of AI.
Fire, Mountain & Men
Over a stunning winter weekend, 24 men gathered at the foothills of Karioi Maunga in Whaingaroa, Raglan. Bathed in sunshine, overlooking the ocean, and held by the captivating energy of Solscape eco-retreat, we found ourselves in the perfect setting to do the work. This land welcomed brothers with over 30 years of men’s work under their belts—and others who had never sat around a fire with men before.
This gathering was also held in an intergenerational context, with our youngest brother at the ripe age of 20, and the eldest, 82. A 62-year age span brought a rare gift: an intergenerational exchange of wisdom, energy, and perspective. Stories of youthful hunger met the steady presence of elders who’ve walked long roads.
Rewrite Your Story — Healing the Father Wound
The theme of the weekend was simple, yet deeply powerful: Rewrite Your Story. At the heart of our time together was the invitation to explore and heal the father wound; the personal and collective impact of our relationships with our fathers, and the masculine lineage we’ve inherited. The invitation was for a man to explore his relationship either with his paternal father, a father figure, or institutional/governmental father archetype. For some, it was the ache of absence. For others, the complicated presence of a man who didn’t know how to love. Some men said goodbye to their fathers that weekend. Others finally welcomed him back into their hearts.
Together, we unpacked the stories and labels that had been handed to us, by parents, teachers, society, and sometimes ourselves. We held them to the light, questioned their truth, and offered them to the fire. Some were released through tears, others carried away by the wind. In that sacred clearing, no longer bound by outdated scripts, we created fertile ground for something new. In the rich compost of release, we planted fresh seeds: of awareness, of self-defined masculinity, of brotherhood, and the possibility of living from a more honest, empowered and joyous centre.
Each day began with deep sauna sessions, clearing the body and sharpening the mind. Cold therapy followed, then presence. The contrast sharpened us. Brotherhood sustained us.
The days were filled with process: the details of which must be experienced, and cannot be translated into a blog post. The depth, honesty and inquiry is not something that can be understood by reading or listening - only by feeling it in the moment. Wellbeing practices were woven through, with a breath to break up the tension, Hatha Yoga to align body, breath and mind, and Somatic Breathwork to send us away with inspiration.
As we sat around the fire, we passed the axe/toki, our symbol of masculine transmission, and listened. Fully. Without interruption. Absorbing stories of pain, triumph, silence, and transformation.
In the centre of it all: an ancient volcanic mauri stone, laid at rest, surrounded photos of our fathers. This stone held the energetic pillar of the weekend.
Between circles and processes, we were nourished by delicious kai, generously provided by Pablitos Kai, Raglan Food Co, Dreamview Creamery, Raglan Roast Coffee, and Raglan Four Square. Their support helped feed the body while we worked the soul.
Uncle/Matua John led with a balance of playful charisma and fierce love. He called us to our edge, and beyond it - with humour, challenge, and heart. He broke the tension when needed. He turned up the heat when we tried to hide. His presence reminded us of what’s possible when masculine leadership is rooted in depth and service.
Over three days, we shared tears, laughter, sweat, fears, dreams, and visions. We opened ourselves to healing and expansion. In our final circle, the energy was palpable; a frequency of love, connection, and open-hearted masculinity. Some called it the best 48 hours of their year. Others, the most meaningful moment of their adult life.
Every man left with a piece of gold. Something to carry home, integrate, and pass forward to his family, partner, community.
More Men around More Fires
This was another activation of the BROS vibration. It continues to evolve, expanding brotherhood across Aotearoa and beyond.
More fires will be lit.
To stay connected with future events, circles, and offerings:
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